Thursday, September 06, 2007

Mmmmmmmm, delicious

Listen, I would never want to be a hater without offering a constructive alternative. And since I was definitely hating in my last post, here is a list of vampire books, with reasons why each of my selections is better than anything by Stephenie Meyer:

The Silver Kiss by Annette Curtis Klause. Because flawed, dangerous, and fragile vampires are much more alluring than ones made of unresistant metallic material that blinds you when the light hits it.

Sweetblood by Pete Hautman. Because people posing as Vampires can be more threatening than the real thing. (Plus this book relates a fascinating and possibly specious theory on the origin of the Vampire myth. Anyone interested in what happens when diabetes goes untreated?)

The Historian, by Elizabeth Kostova. (Adult fiction, but the narrator is a teenager at the time when the story takes place.) Because the plot unfolds like those elaborate fortune tellers you used to make in middle school. And each time you lift a corner, you're in another splendid and sinister setting, from France to Romania to Istanbul.

Peeps, by Scott Westerfield. Because if you're going to make stuff up, you might as well go all the way and invent a new, urban flesh-eating creature that does what old fashioned vampires did: exorcise the writers' anxiety about sex.

Thirsty, by M.T. Anderson. Because nothing is more revolting than eating a helping of human flesh casserole and licking your own blood off your face.

No comments: